From: Warren Moore <warren.moore@cbis.com>

"Good Times Virus...Release 2.0"

       There's a new virus that will re-write your hard drive.
Not only that, it will scramble any disks that are even
close to your computer. It will recalibrate your refrigerator's
coolness setting so all your ice cream goes melty. It will
demagnetize the strips on all your credit cards, screw up the
tracking on your television and use subspace field harmonics to
scratch any CD's you try to play.

        It will give your ex-girl or boyfriend your new phone
number. It will mix Kool-aid into your fishtank. It will drink all
your wine and leave its socks out on the coffee table when there's
company coming over. It will put a dead squirrel in the back pocket of
your good pants and hide your car keys when you are late for work.

        Goodtimes 2.0 will make you fall in love with a penguin. It
will give you nightmares about circus midgets. It will pour
sugar in your gas tank and shave off both your eyebrows while
dating your girl or boyfriend behind your back and billing the
dinner and hotel room to your Discover card.

         It will seduce your grandmother. It does not matter if
she is dead; such is the power of Goodtimes 2.0.  It reaches out
beyond the grave to sully those things we hold most dear.

        It moves your car randomly around parking lots so you
can't find it.  It will kick your dog. It will leave libidinous
messages on your boss's voice mail in your voice! It is insidious and
subtle. It is dangerous and terrifying to behold. It is also a rather
interesting shade of mauve.

        Goodtimes 2.0  will give you Dutch Elm disease. It will
leave the toilet seat up. It will make a batch of Methamphe-
tamine in your bathtub and then leave bacon cooking on
the stove while it goes out to chase gradeschoolers with
your new snowblower.

        Goodtimes 2.0 will prompt your mother to call on Friday and
Saturday nights for two months after you make a new
girlfriend/boyfriend. It will place your wallet and keys on an
obscure shelf in the basement. It will emulate your face and stare
into the neighbor's bathroom window.

        Goodtimes 2.0 has been linked to cancer in laboratory mice.  9 out
of 10 dentists recommend Goodtimes.

        Goodtimes 2.0 will make your bloomers shrink two sizes, and it
will make you gain 15 pounds.  If this results in a wedgie, then
Goodtimes will  leave a nasty skid mark.

* PLEASE listen to me! The "GoodTimes" virus DOES NOT does
not exist!!  Neither does any virus which claims to be spread via
e-mail.  E-mail messages are TEXT FILES ! ! !  *

But just to be safe, better run that virus scanner now that you've read this!