From apa@carfax.ims.advantis.comTue Mar  4 09:48:06 1997
Date: Mon, 03 Mar 97 15:06:33 -0500
From: "Laura C. Sloat" <apa@carfax.ims.advantis.com>
To: kaysee@vnet.ibm.com, helpern@vnet.ibm.com, nlifshutz@vnet.ibm.com,
    hfarkas@carfax.ims.advantis.com
Subject: want to groan......


------- Forwarded Message
>Subject: Things to ponder...
>
>If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
>
>If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it
>considered a hostage situation?
>
>Instead of talking to your plants, if you yelled at them would they still
>grow?  Only to be troubled and insecure?
>
>Is there another word for synonym?
>
>Isn't is it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
>
>When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?
>
>When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown
>away?
>
>Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?
>
>Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
>
>Why do they report power outages on TV?
>
>What do you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an
>endangered plant?
>
>If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
>
>Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
>
>Why do they lock gas station bathrooms?  Are they afraid someone will clean
>them?
>
>If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their headlights
off
>
>If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
>
>When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?
>
>Why is the word abbreviation so long?
>



------- End of Forwarded Message